“Table for one?”

“Table for one?”

“Yes please”, I reply, with a smirk on my face.

This is weird. I can’t actually remember the last time I went out for lunch by myself. 

Lilly is tired after I woke her at 5am for this morning’s Out of the Shadows suicide awareness walk for Lifeline. So tired that she fell asleep at 11am in Jack’s arms in the middle of the shopping centre. Lilly likes to walk so we rarely take a pram out, which meant that the options were to hold her or put her in the car and go home. 

One of Jack’s favourite past times is to watch people in shopping centres, (it’s weird, I know, but he finds it calming) so he sent me off to have lunch by myself while he holds Lilly and watches the world go by. 

So here I am, at a real restaurant, on my table for one, having ‘me time’. That’s what we’re meant to do, right? ‘Me time’? 

‘Me time’. Glosswitch puts it best:

“me time” is … what other people call “time” or, to give it its full name, “time when you’re not at work in which you do other stuff” … The importance of “me time” cannot be stressed enough. Whereas normal people have “time” just because it’s there and you’ve got to do something in it, mummies have “me time” because without it they’d be total bitches from hell.

Perhaps Jack was getting in early to try to save me from becoming a bitch from hell… it was a 4am start to the day, after all!

Anyway, here I am, trying to work out what it is I am supposed to do when I haven’t got a toddler climbing on me or poking her sticky little fingers in my food, a laptop to work on, or a friend to chat to. 

As mothers we’re constantly told that ‘me time’ is important. I get it, looking after small people can be tiring to say the least, we do need to take some time out. Yet offer me some time alone and I’ll choose Lilly every time. I spend the best part of 3 days per week away from home at work, so I like to make the most of the time we have together. Lunch by myself is last on my list of priorities. Sticky little fingers are the best kind of company. 

For now though, I’ll take my table for one and my fancy iced tea, put my phone down, stop thinking about the missed opportunity to get some work done (#naptimehustle – that hashtag still makes me laugh) and watch the world go by. 

Edited to add … I even had time for dessert…


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